My partner recently asked me this question, what do you really want in life? I honestly did not have an answer to the question for the first time in my life, I always have an answer about my goals in life but recently with all the changes that are happening in my life, I did not know how to answer the question.
For the first time in my life, I did not know what I really wanted in life. I have noticed that most of my goals were really not about me but it was about proving people around me that I can really be something in life, it was all about other people and not for me. I am a people’s pleaser by nature and that has really blinded me into thinking that having goals that will please other people will also make me happy, that is not true.
I have decided to really do self-introspective about what do I really want in life. I have noticed most of my goals were really not mine, I was living people’s dreams and not my own. I have been told what was I supposed to be in life but it was really never something I wanted. For example, I was told to go to tertiary, graduate, get a good job, be independent, buy your own house, buy your parents a house and then get a man who will marry you. I have noticed that I have lived my life according to that life plan, but it is not really me, I am not happy with it and I am not living to the best potential of myself.
I am at the point now where I am figuring what makes me happy, what do I really want in life, where I set down my principles and values, where I set boundaries in my life. I had to unlearn everything I have been taught about life and figure out what makes me happy. Now I know it’s ok to be a housewife and have kids without a paycheck every month. It’s ok to depend on your partner for financial support and really enjoy to be dependent. I know it’s ok to say no to monthly paycheck an start your own business. I know it’s ok to decide not to feel pressured to get married just because of your age. It is ok to value family and friendship over money. It is ok to have different values than your neighbours. We all in the same game called life, it is up to you how you really want to play it. Others play to win, others play to enjoy and it’s ok, it all about choices and decisions at the end. We have to reach an understanding of ourselves at some point and know that we must live life to the fullest. It is between you and God, who are people to judge.
Next time, if someone asks me “what do you really want in life?” and I don’t know the answer at that time, I will say”I don’t know yet but I am really trying out things that make me happy and I know that will show me what really do I want in life” Its ok not to have all the answers in life. We are here on earth to learn, to rediscover ourselves and also enjoy life not always take it seriously. Right now I enjoy writing and sharing my experiences on my fashion blog.
I hope you enjoy my article and really know it is ok not to know everything. I would like to hear from you about your experiences when it comes to such questions, how do you respond to it and what is your belief about your life goals.